Taking Control of a Negotiation By Doing . . . Nothing | NoBSJobSearchAdvice.com

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EP 1517 Taking control the negotiations actually pretty easy.  It’s just hard to do.

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I'm Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter. I’m the head coach for JobSearchCoachingHQ.com and NoBSCoachingAdvice.com.

This is a tactic for use in negotiating. It’s a way to command the room and command the situation, in effect, by doing nothing. I am going to illustrate it for you.

For example, if someone was talking with and was about to make you an offer, “what would you say to (fill in the blank)?” Then, you pause for a second and say (Silence) and then spoke. What's the message that you're sending to the person who is extending the offer? Is the message that you are thrilled? I don’t think so. Is it a message that you're really weighing this carefully and that the next thing you do is you're going to say is important? Who's in control here? Who's in charge of the negotiation at that moment? The answer is you because you held the space by just being quiet for a few seconds.

Quiet is 1 of those great techniques that exist in so many situations because, culturally, we get anxious. When we don't hear a noise or get a response we rush in and kind of fill the space fill the space. But instead we wait 3 seconds, just 3 seconds, when someone says something that sounds ridiculous to us or we are not pleased with, or we want to control the room because we are speaking, you stand up in front of the audience and wait 3 seconds, look at them (I am going to illustrate it here one more time) you pause for a second and then just wait . . . people are waiting for you to speak.

I only did it for 2 seconds there; imagine the full 3. Imagine that when you are negotiating. Imagine that when someone is trying to push you into doing something that you're not pleased with.

This is 1 of the classic things recruiters do. Third party recruiters try to bully people into making a decision that they don’t want to make. They pester and they push and they bludgeon and then, at the end of all of that, if you waited for a few seconds, and then asked, “Are you done?” Who's in charge?

At that point who has taken the power a that point. You or them? I'm very confident that it’s you.


Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter
Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter

Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter is a career and leadership coach who worked as a recruiter for more than 40 years. He is the host of “No BS Job Search Advice Radio,” the #1 podcast in iTunes for job search with more than 1500 episodes and his newest show, “No BS Coaching Advice.” He is a member of The Forbes Coaches Council. “No BS JobSearch Advice Radio” was recently named a Top 10 podcast for job search. JobSearchTV.com was also recently named a Top 10 YouTube channel for job search.

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Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter
Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter

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