What to Do If You Hate Your Job
By Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter
This is derived from an interview with Jessica Sweet on the Find Your Dream Job podcast. I hope you’ll enjoy the conversation and what is shared.
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Ever feel that Sunday evening dread? Yeah, you know that feeling, wondering if your out of office message should really be a one way ticket out of your current job? You’re not alone. Today, we’re diving into an episode of The Find Your Dream Job podcast. The guest was career coach and licensed therapist Jessica Sweet and she gave some super insightful advice about figuring out if it’s time for a career change, and if so, how to gracefully make that leap. It is
fascinating, isn’t it? I mean, we hear all the time, if you hate your job, just quit, hmm. But Jessica reminds us there’s actually a lot more to it than that. It’s less about just straight up hating your job, and more about honestly looking at if the bad outweighs any benefits, you know, financial or anything else. Yeah, it’s
about recognizing when those Sunday scaries are more than just a case of the Mondays. Jessica calls it Sunday night dread, yeah, and it’s a signal we should all be paying attention to. Oh,
absolutely. And that dread, you know, it can show up in so many ways, physically, emotionally, even mentally. It’s like your body is giving you this not so subtle nudge, like, hey, something isn’t right here.
This reminds me so much of someone I used to work with. We’ll call him Bob, and Bob, he was like the ultimate quiet quitter. Before that was even a thing like it was so obvious to everyone, he was just going through the motions. But he stayed at that job for years, even though you could tell it was making him totally miserable. It is
easy to get stuck in that pattern, but Jessica cautions against just quitting without a plan that leap into the unknown. It’s tempting for sure, but honestly, it often just makes things more stressful in the long run.
So how do we prevent ourselves from becoming the next Bob, but also not stay stuck in a job that’s making us unhappy? One
of Jessica’s big recommendations is to actually start your job searching while you’re still at your current job.
Okay, so I can definitely see how that would be the last thing you’d want to do if you’re already feeling burned out. But I’m definitely curious. Why is that so important? Well,
research actually shows that employers tend to see someone with a job as more desirable. There’s an element of social proof to it. It’s like, well, if someone else wants them, they must be valuable, plus, already being employed can actually give you a leg up when you’re negotiating your salary and benefits at a new place, because you’re not coming from this place of desperation, you’re coming from a position of strength.
Okay, that totally makes sense when you put it like that, yeah, it’s kind of like dating, right? Like you’re way more likely to attract a great partner when you’re already happy and fulfilled in your own life. But let’s be real, trying to juggle a job search while you’re working full time, that’s definitely no easy task. Oh, exactly.
It’s a marathon, not a sprint, and it takes a strategic approach. For sure, one thing Jessica warns against is, you know, falling into the trap of constantly complaining during this time.
Oh, I think I’ve been guilty of that. Sometimes it feels good in the moment to vent to co workers, but it’s probably not actually that productive. I get it. It’s totally
understandable to want to share those frustrations with people, but Jessica actually suggests that we try to channel that energy into something much more beneficial, self reflection. So instead
of just fixating on what’s making us unhappy in our current job, we should be using that energy to figure out what we really want, yes,
exactly, taking the time to examine what went wrong in your previous job, or even just in your career as a whole up to this point, that can give you really valuable clues about what to look for in your next opportunity, things like journaling or talking to a trusted friend. Emphasis on trusted so maybe not your work. Bestie, this time, these are all great ways to process those feelings and uncover some of those hidden desires you might not have realized you had. It’s
like that saying those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it, except in this case, it’s more like those who don’t learn from their bad jobs are doomed to repeat them.
It really is like you’re holding up this mirror to your career and really seeing it clearly. It can help you see those patterns, you know, like maybe you’re always drawn to those really fast paced environments, but then you end up craving more work life balance, or maybe you do your best work when you’re collaborating, but you’re stuck in this role that’s super isolating.
So it’s about recognizing what you really need to thrive and using that to make better choices going forward Exactly.
And once you’ve done that inner work, Jessica suggests focusing on three practical steps. Get that resume ready to go. Dust off those networking skills. And this is a big one, get really clear on what your target is. Yeah, that
makes sense. It’s easy to get caught up in just wanting out of a bad situation, but then you end up just feeling lost if you don’t know where you’re
going. Totally Think of it like a GPS. You need to know both coordinates where you are now and your destination to find the best route, having that target, that vision of your ideal job or industry, well, it just makes the whole search process so much more focused. I’ve
definitely seen that happen, like when people try to be everything to everyone, they end up resonating with no one. I had a friend who was applying for everything from marketing jobs to like dog walking gigs when she was having a career crisis, no wonder nothing seemed to click. It’s true
when you’re clear. About what you want, your networking becomes more strategic, too. You can be more intentional about who you’re connecting with, and your resume becomes this targeted document that really highlights the specific skills and experience that are relevant to those dream roles. So it’s
about quality over quantity, yeah, being intentional instead of just desperate. Exactly. Okay, so let’s say you’ve got a new job lined up those final days at a job you’re ready to leave, those can be so awkward. Got any advice on how to navigate that exit gracefully?
Oh, for sure, Jessica actually had some great tips on this, especially when it comes to those exit interviews. You know it’s tempting to use that as a chance to air all your grievances and finally, tell your boss how you really feel,
and maybe do a little victory dance on the way out the door. Huh?
Tempting, yeah, but probably not the best career move. The world’s a lot smaller than you think, and you never know when you might cross paths with those people again.
Okay, good point. So how do you balance being honest about your experience without totally burning bridges.
Jessica recommends emphasizing the pull of something new, not just pushing away from the old job. It’s a subtle difference, but it can make a huge difference in how you come across.
So instead of saying, I’m out of here because this place is a dumpster fire, it’s more like I’m really excited about this new opportunity that’s a better fit for my long term goals. Got it. It’s like you’re focused on the open door in front of you, not the one slam and shut behind you, exactly. And it’s
not about being dishonest or anything. It’s just about framing things in a way that really highlights what you want. You know, those exit interviews, they’re more about the company gathering information. It’s not really your chance to vent. So
what do you say when they ask? Why are you leaving? Jessica
suggests having, like, a little elevator pitch ready to go something short, positive, like, I’m so grateful for everything I’ve learned here, but I’m looking for a role where I can and then fill in the blank, you know, like lead a team or use my design skills more. This new opportunity and new company seems like a perfect fit for that.
So you’re taking the focus off what you weren’t getting and putting it on what you were pursuing. Exactly.
You’re showing them you’re ambitious and proactive. And hey, if you do still need to process some of those tougher emotions around leaving. Jessica has a great suggestion, write it all down like you’re venting in a letter to your boss, and then, ooh,
burn the letter exactly. I love that. It’s like you’re releasing those feelings without actually torching any bridges. Yeah. So basically, what we’re taking away from this is that dealing with a job you don’t love, it’s not just about quitting. It’s about being really intentional with your career. Yes, both figuring out what you want and then going after it. I
couldn’t agree more, our careers, their journey, is not just destinations, right? There are gonna be bumps along the way, for sure, detours. But you know what? Sometimes those lead to opportunities you’d never even imagined. That is
so true. Well, on that note, we’ll leave you with this thought, if you could design your ideal work life, no limits, what would that look like? What would it feel like? What impact would you make? Let those questions guide you on your own career journey, until next time, happy diving you.
ABOUT JEFF ALTMAN, THE BIG GAME HUNTER
People hire Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter to provide No BS job search coaching and career advice globally because he makes job search
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