The Quiet Person
By Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter
This was the second time I hosted the group and the second time I felt excluded from it.
The stories were all old as we played a little catch-up, the conversation as too many do these days turned to politics. The hyenas came out, cackling their opinions. As I do these days, I tuned them out and asked that the conversation be changed to something else. Quickly the conversation returned to where I
asked it not to.
I was brought back to a time in life where the same men kept me on the periphery of the group. The feeling of being tolerated rather than accepted returned.
I thought of all those meetings I had attended in my professional career where there are people on the fringes of the core of the group who, generally, are ignored, dismissed, and otherwise treated like potted plants.
Now, let me talk to you “potted plants.”
It’s easy to succumb to the feelings of dismissal but, as Justice Ginsburg said, “Fight for the things that you care about, and do it in a way that will lead others to join you.”
Accepting the tyranny of the majority is your choice. At times, it may be a wise decision. At times, it is a habit that should be revisited.
For you in the majority, you’re missing something. You wanted certain people in the room and then didn’t include them in the discussion. Don’t blame it on them. You created the conditions and you can change those conditions.
If they were important enough and valuable enough to be present, they are important enough and valuable enough to be included and not ignored or dismissed.
All ideas need to be shared openly and the environment doesn’t support that. There are consequences for having those kinds of environments just like there was when we closed our call and I told everyone I would not be participating until after January (2021) when the election was decided. The next morning, I went so far as to message everyone my decision from withdrawing from future conversations. My energies need to be focused on other projects rather than convincing people that I should be heard.
I’ve said many times that winners find the way to win and losers find a way to lose. Some games can’t be won. Thus, rather than waste energy and time, the winner finds again that they can win.
Ⓒ The Big Game Hunter, Inc., Asheville, NC 2020, 2023
Trying
ABOUT JEFF ALTMAN, THE BIG GAME HUNTER
Jeff Altman, The Big Game Hunter is a coach who worked as a recruiter for what seems like one hundred years. He is hired to provide No BS Career Advice globally. That can involve job search, hiring staff, management, leadership, career transition and advice about resolving workplace issues. Schedule a discovery call at my website, www.TheBigGameHunter.us
He is the host of “No BS Job Search Advice Radio,” the #1 podcast in iTunes for job search with over 2500 episodes.
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